Tough decision

My grandmother is not doing very well.  Her health has been deteriorating since last fall and seems to have taken a turn for the worse.  She's 97 years old and just hasn't recovered well from fall bladder surgery.  

Now, I have to decide if I want to see her before she passes or not.  Up until this afternoon I was planning to go Memorial Day weekend, but my dad isn't sure she will make it that long.

For most people this probably isn't a decision, but I'm really not very close to her.  Plus, I don't know that I want my last memories of her to to be with her in a hospital in the hospital.  The last time I saw her she was sitting in her chair in her house enjoying having her family around. That is much more pleasant memory.

I'm sure some of you think I'm a terrible person, and maybe I am.  Most of you probably think I will regret it if I don't go.  I'm pretty comfortable in saying that I won't even if that makes me a terrible person.

My being there doesn't change anything for her, but it might please my dad.  Is that a reason to go?  I just don't know.

I need some more time to think and pray.  My dad is correct when he said that I have to be comfortable with the consequences of my decision which ever way I go.

~Heather