Missing My Boy

We left Aiden at Grandma and Grandpa's on Sunday, and I miss him...a lot.  I know he is having a fantastic time, and it's good for him to get some special attention and good for Rylee to get some time with just me and Joseph.  It doesn't matter how happy, healthy, and wonderful he is there.  He's my baby, and I miss him.  

As I was telling my friend Amy today there is just something special between a mom and a son.  I knew Aiden and I had a special relationship before I had Rylee, and I wondered how she would change it and how it would be different with her.  It's hard to put it all into words.  My relationship with Aiden is still very special, but I don't give him the time and attention that he deserves.  There just isn't enough of me to go around some days.  He handles it very well most days, and I know that as Rylee gets older it's easier to give Aiden more of me which is good because I never know when he's going to want Dad more than Mom.  My relationship with Rylee is already changing as she becomes more of a daddy's girl.  It's totally fine with me.  I want them to have what Aiden and I have.  Joseph can feel the difference in his relationship with the kids a little too (I asked him about it the other night).  You would think the genders would stick together, but it seems to go to opposites when they are little.  I know that someday those roles will change.  Aiden will need his dad more than me, and Rylee will need me more.  I actually have tears in my eyes as I type because I'm so going to miss that closeness with my firstborn.  I am so excited about sharing special things with her.  I hope she likes to craft or get mani/pedis, but I'll do whatever she likes to do.  

I love my children so much.  They are such blessings in my life.  Everyday is better because I get to hug and kiss them.  I feel like a part of me is missing when we aren't all together.  It may be easier with one.  I may get places sooner with one.  It doesn't matter.  We are a foursome now, and we are a quarter low with one gone.  I'll always let him go (and her too when she's ready) because I know it's good for all involved, but it'll always make me a little sad.

It's a good thing we're going to get him back tomorrow.  :)  Momma Sarah, I know you are reading this, and I know you understand.  I love you, and I thank you for raising my husband to be the amazing man that he is.  I also thank you for loving my kids and giving them a place in your home, and I love that they love being there with you guys.  It takes a village to raise kids, and my kids are blessed to have a village full of love.

~Heather

Day 12 of 365