Hormones

OK, I am going to try to write this without sharing TOO much information, but please forgive me if I do.  It's just where I am today and another example of me being me.  (Plus, it's late, and I'm really tired.)

My hormones have been completely all over the map since I had Rylee.  I have to keep reminding myself that I had a baby 9 and a half months ago and stopped nursing just 5 months ago.  I just don't remember having this much trouble after Aiden.  I remember the initial weepy moments after having him, but it didn't last long.  We didn't nurse nearly as long either, and I went right back on the pill.

Maybe that's the difference.  Maybe it's that I am so much older this time around.  I seriously don't think that my body knows what it's supposed to do, and it's driving my brain mad.

I have had days that I completely thought I was insane and cried like there was no tomorrow.  Last night I had crazy weird chills out of nowhere.  I guess I can be relieved that I'm not having hot flashes.  LOL!  I can't seem to lose weight even though I am trying.  I know it doesn't seem like much, but it's frustrating and annoying (and I'm skipping some details).

Whatever the reason, I am very grateful that it seems to be getting better as the time passes, and that I am learning how to better control most of the symptoms.  I am also very grateful for having a loving husband who lets me complain and listens to every ugly detail.  Every woman should have such support when going through tough times.

It's seems so unfair to go through pregnancy, delivery, and be this far after and still feel effects.  Granted, I am just assuming it's my hormones being in disarray that is causing so many issues.  Every time I start to wonder if maybe I should see a doctor, I remember that it takes time heal and get back to normal.  I just have to patient.  I'll be seeing Dr. Pappas in a few months, and if it's still a problem I'll talk to him.

But you know what?  I would deal with all of this and so much more to have my darling babies!!!  They are worth every bit of it and then some.


~Heather


Day 24 of 365